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  • Addressing Online pornography: Supporting teens

Talking about pornography with teens

Guidance to support 14+

Starting a conversation about online pornography with teens can be difficult but this is the age that they will need the most support to ensure they develop a healthy understanding of sex and relationships and consent.

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How to talk about porn with teens

Talk about body image

  • Encourage them to challenge unrealistic ideals on body image and be critical about images they see online and in the media
  • Discuss their thoughts on body image and any concerns they may have about themselves
  • Help them to accept bodies of all shapes and sizes and not to subscribe to an unrealistic body image ideal
  • Be a role model by accepting your body and maintaining a positive attitude towards food
    and exercise

Talk about relationships and sex

  • Have an open conversation about their values and attitudes towards sex and relationships to be aware of what they believe and give them the right information
  • Emphasise the importance of having love, respect, and trust in a healthy relationship and give them examples that they can look to
  • Discuss the importance of ‘safe sex’ and the prevention of sexually transmitted diseases
  • Help them develop coping strategies when it comes to dealing with pressure from friends to watch porn,
    have sex or send nudes
  • Talk about what consent looks like in a relationship
  • You can encourage them to visit the Disrespect Nobody website to learn more about consent and signs of relationship abuse

Talk about online porn

  • Discuss the fact that porn doesn’t always show what sex is like in real life 
  • Talk about the ways that it may pressure others to look or behave in a certain way
  • Encourage them not to use it as a source of ‘sexual education’ and mirror what they see
  • Talk about how extreme porn can lead them to develop unrealistic expectations of sexual behaviours
  • Talk about the importance of consent and the way women are portrayed

Parents' guide to address issue of online pornography with teens

Dos & Don’ts to consider

Do

Do

  • Stress that what they are seeing is often a conflation of sex and violence, is dictated by a handful of pornographers that use extreme acts to shock people into watching and has little bearing on reality
  • Talk about unrealistic expectations, from hairless bodies to fake breasts
  • Highlight sexualised images when you see them (especially in day-to-day places like music videos, magazines and advertising)
  • Ask them to think critically about what they see online
  • Have an open door policy, be patient, be on their side.
Don't

Don’t

  • Allow pornographers to talk to them before you
  • Make them feel guilty about what they have seen, it’s important that your child can talk to you about it
  • Forget to check in with them regularly

We’ve created an advice hub to offer parents more tips and advice to help protect children and young people from online pornography.

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More to explore

See related advice and practical tips to support children online:

  • Advice for 14+ year olds
  • Online pornography resources
  • Support wellbeing with tech

On site links

  • Digital Resilience Toolkit
  • Online pornography advice hub
  • Conversation starters to encourage kids to share their digital lives

Related Web Links

Visit the AMAZE website for age-appropriate information about puberty for tweens and parents

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  • Young children (6-10)
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